A very lonely woman wrote the following letter to a well-known counselor.

“John and I were deeply in love when we got married, we struggled in the first 2 or 3 years with our financial problems, I loved him and I know that he loved me. But then something slowly began to change. I am not sure how to describe it, but I think it had something to do with his receiving a promotion about five years ago, and that required him to work longer hours. We needed the money so I did not mind the extra hours, but it never seemed to stop. Now he comes home late every evening, so tired, I can actually hear his feet dragging as he approaches the door. I look forward to his coming home each night because I have so much to tell him, but he never feels like talking. So I fix his dinner and he eats alone, of course I have already eaten earlier with the kids that night. After dinner he makes a few phone calls and works at his desk. Frankly, I kind of like his talking on the phone so I can hear his voice, then watches TV till he goes to bed, except Tuesday when he plays basketball with the guys or when he has a meeting at the office. Every Saturday morning he plays golf at the club with three friends. 

On Sundays we are at church for a lot of the day. It is easy for us to go 2 or 3 months without an in-depth conversation. You know what I mean. I get so lonely in that house with those three kids climbing over me I do not know what to do. There are no women in the neighborhood I can talk to because most of them have gone back to work already. John never takes me out to dinner anymore, and last month he forgot our anniversary. I do not think he has a romantic bone in his body, he would not know the difference between a rose and a carnation. And his Christmas card last month was signed just John. There is no closeness, no warmth and it is frankly more than I can handle.”

The woman probably thought that she was alone in these feelings, but unfortunately, she is a part of a majority of women who are physically living together with their husbands, but emotionally are very far apart. It does not have to be this way. In this lesson on marriage, we will examine what it looks like to keep a marriage not only alive, but also flourishing over the years.